Chapter Seventy-Nine: Resolution of the Heart

By the time he reached the teaching building, the sound of students reciting filled the air. Standing at the entrance, Song Nianqiang let out a sigh—this place was never truly his. His world was fraught with danger, so different from the vast majority of students inside. He headed straight up to the fourth floor, arriving at Jiang Ningzhi’s classroom. From the doorway, he could see her hunched over her books, diligently memorizing her lessons, and a strange feeling welled up in his heart. Would Jiang Ningzhi really find happiness with him? He couldn’t even be sure that he wouldn’t disappear without warning someday. Was it wise to leave someone so dear at his side?

Song Nianqiang watched Jiang Ningzhi quietly for a few minutes, then turned to leave. His action was noticed by Ren Tian inside the classroom. Just as Song Nianqiang turned away, Ren Tian walked over to Jiang Ningzhi, leaned on her desk, and began chatting with her. Song Nianqiang could see clearly that Jiang Ningzhi was happy, smiling as she spoke with Ren Tian—perhaps he should never have appeared in her life at all. With a faint smile, he left in silence.

Back in his own classroom, Song Nianqiang spent the entire midday break lying across his desk, not intending to leave even when school let out. All noon, he pondered whether he should give up Jiang Ningzhi. Rationally, he knew he must, but another voice within him clamored: could he really let go of a four-year-long affection at a whim? He doubted anyone could do so easily, and certainly not himself.

The classroom gradually emptied until he was the only one left, quietly resting his head on the desk. They were dismissed at eleven fifty; now it was twelve twenty. The school required all students to return to their dorms by twelve thirty, or else their daily performance score would be docked.

Although those scores didn’t matter much, as high school students, they cared about every mark, regardless of its relevance to their college entrance exams.

A soft creak sounded—the door to Song Nianqiang’s classroom was gently pushed open. A small head peeked inside, glancing around. The pretty little face froze momentarily, then was quickly flooded with joy. She tiptoed over to Song Nianqiang, drew a strand of hair from her forehead, and lightly tickled his hand.

“Stop fooling around, Jiang Ningzhi.” Song Nianqiang had hoped to speak sternly to scare her off, but when he summoned his courage, the words simply wouldn’t come. “Hehe, when did you get here? Why didn’t you come find me?”

She pretended to pout, but even Jiang Ningzhi’s angry look was adorable in Song Nianqiang’s eyes. Watching her purse her lips, he smiled. “I came looking for you this morning, but seeing how focused you were on your studies, I couldn’t bear to disturb you.”

“Hmph! At least you know better!” Jiang Ningzhi sat beside him, her big, lovely eyes fixed on Song Nianqiang. As her eyes blinked, he wanted nothing more than to pull her into his arms, but he understood his purpose—he was still weak, unable to protect Jiang Ningzhi. Perhaps, when he became a master ghost hunter, he would finally be able to say those words to her.

“Ningzhi, I—” Something in Song Nianqiang’s mind nearly prompted him to utter the words, but he caught himself just in time. Jiang Ningzhi’s long lashes fluttered, waiting for his next sentence. “I—I—I’m hungry!” After a long pause, those were the words he finally managed.

The disappointment was obvious. No matter how well she tried to hide it, Song Nianqiang could see it. “Don’t blame me—my responsibilities have changed. For you, for myself, forgive me this time, Ningzhi! I like you!” But these words could only be whispered in his heart.

They walked along the school’s pathways together. Truthfully, Song Nianqiang wasn’t hungry; he just wanted to spend more time alone with Jiang Ningzhi. The feeling was wonderful—at that moment, they were just like a couple, strolling beneath the leafy green paths, chatting and laughing.

“Nianqiang, I want to tell you something. Ever since you saved me in the classroom, I—”

“Ningzhi, look at that flower—isn’t it beautiful!” Before Jiang Ningzhi could finish, Song Nianqiang interrupted her. He knew what she was about to say, but he was afraid—afraid that if she spoke those words, he wouldn’t have the heart to refuse, and then he might really drag her into his troubles.

The flower he pointed to was nothing special; such flowers were everywhere in the school. He only wanted to cut her off. Jiang Ningzhi glanced at him in disappointment, tears already glistening in her eyes, though she held them back. She responded softly, and the two fell silent.

“I’ll walk you back to your dorm—I'm heading back now.” After a while, Song Nianqiang broke the silence. Jiang Ningzhi said nothing more; tears had already begun to fall, landing on the ground in tiny droplets. Song Nianqiang didn’t look at her, afraid that if he continued walking with her, he wouldn’t resist pulling her into his embrace.

On the way, they passed a group of school officials, but the leaders seemed not to notice them, turning their heads and walking the other way. In silence, they continued until they reached the entrance of the girls’ dormitory. Suddenly, Jiang Ningzhi grabbed Song Nianqiang’s hand, her voice trembling, “Can we go for another walk? I have something I want to tell you!”

For a girl—especially one as outstanding as Jiang Ningzhi—to do this took courage. But Song Nianqiang was determined not to continue. His heart was already wavering, and he knew if he lingered, he would certainly agree to whatever Jiang Ningzhi asked.

He waved his hand and strode away. Watching his resolute departure, Jiang Ningzhi’s tears flowed uncontrollably. Only when Song Nianqiang’s figure vanished from sight did she wipe her eyes and head upstairs.

Back in her dorm, she lay on her bed and burst into tears. Her roommates all knew Jiang Ningzhi had made it a habit to visit Song Nianqiang’s classroom after school every noon, but today she returned in tears. Her friends gathered to ask why, their main concern being to comfort her.

Between sobs, Jiang Ningzhi recounted everything that had happened with Song Nianqiang. Her friends listened, incensed but helpless. They’d all heard of Song Nianqiang, but none knew him well.

“Ningzhi, don’t worry, I’ll help you get revenge! I’ll chase after him, and when I catch him, I’ll dump him to make you feel better!” Cao Jianjia said, her tone tinged with anger. Though she had always admired Jiang Ningzhi, the eight of them shared a dormitory, and high school was the best time for forging friendships. Despite occasional minor squabbles, their bond was strong.

Another reason was that Cao Jianjia wanted to prove she was not inferior to Jiang Ningzhi. Among the dormmates, only she and Jiang Ningzhi excelled academically and in looks, so they often competed with each other, though it never affected their friendship.

Rounding a corner, Song Nianqiang stopped, tears streaming down his face, only snapping out of it when the salty taste reached his mouth. Was he doing the right thing? He had been secretly in love with Jiang Ningzhi for four years, and just as he was about to succeed, he suddenly withdrew.

Letting the tears flow, Song Nianqiang wandered aimlessly, Jiang Ningzhi’s image filling his mind. How desperately he wanted to run back and embrace her, telling her he liked her. Yet, recalling the weight of his responsibilities and the promises he made to his mother, scene after scene flashed before his eyes. He wiped the tears from his face and strode purposefully toward the school gate.