141. Love’s Wild Heart Burns Again (Please Subscribe)

Anyone with the financial means to travel abroad can certainly afford a meal, and those capable of traveling internationally are mostly quite well off. A trip to Thailand basically boils down to southern island tours or northern cultural, artistic, and religious sightseeing. The former probably holds a stronger appeal for men, what with the bikinis on the beach... and the legendary red-light districts, whereas women, especially literary-minded and artistic women, heavily favor these northern cities.

If Bai Haonan had been given a choice, he naturally would have headed south to popular hotspots like Phuket or Pattaya. But thinking from a different perspective, if he played a defensive, wait-and-watch game, wouldn't he be far more likely to encounter female domestic tourists in the north?

This was a perk Bai Haonan had never even imagined.

When the morning classes ended, Master Tianlong had not spoken a single word to Bai Haonan in private. During lunch, Master Aida simply asked if he was facing any difficulties. Bai Haonan answered honestly. In truth, both Master Tianlong and Master Aida were of Chinese descent, bilingual in Chinese and Thai since childhood, and even fluent in Thai-accented English. However, expecting Bai Haonan to master Thai or English within three months was completely unrealistic. Master Aida suggested shifting him to evening small-group Chinese lectures, while assigning him to work as a monastery greeter during the day. After all, most of the monks fluent in Mandarin within the temple were senior supervisors in their thirties or forties; how could they possibly spare the time to act as tour guides and service staff?

Falling from the esteemed position of a top-league professional football player down to a temple service worker might have caused another man to feel humiliated or wallow in self-pity. But Bai Haonan merely recalled the fleeting glances of the female tourists' appearances during morning alms-giving and the morning lectures, and instantly, his spirits soared with enthusiasm!

He was so enthusiastically excited that even Master Aida was taken aback. Sensing the undisguised lust shimmering in this fellow's eyes, the master repeatedly emphasized that physical contact with female tourists was strictly forbidden. The moment a tourist lodged a complaint, he would face severe punishment and might even be locked in solitary confinement!

Bai Haonan burst into laughter, patted his chest, and promised to behave!

For an old hand like him, the true joy of picking up women didn't necessarily require physical penetration and the exchange of bodily fluids anymore.

So, after barely an hour of crash course training, and amidst Master Aida's nervous anxiety, Bai Haonan excitedly went on duty, bringing Ada along with him!

His very first service station was the towering, golden giant stupa, the signature landmark right at the main entrance of this most famous temple in northern Thailand. Almost all foreign tourists, especially Chinese tourists, stepping down from the temple's parking lot, would instantly have their eyes drawn by that dazzling golden stupa. Coupled with the northern Thai weather—which, barring rain, was consistently clear with brilliant sunshine and dazzling blue skies—the blue was outrageously vivid, and the clouds looked like exaggerated, fluffy marshmallows. To Bai Haonan, they resembled the mushroom clouds after an atomic bomb explosion. Against such a backdrop of sky, the twenty-to-thirty-meter-tall golden stupa radiated brilliantly, effortlessly evoking solemnity and reverence toward the Buddha statues within.

Even Bai Haonan, upon arrival, miraculously felt his lewd desires recede considerably. He respectfully bowed to the stupa first, forced Ada to follow suit, and then, foolishly and much like any regular tourist, walked over to strike a nearby giant bronze gong nearly two meters in diameter. Hanging there, the round gong stood much taller than Bai Haonan himself. Perhaps because of its immense size, when he struck it with the pumpkin-shaped mallet—which rivaled the legendary weapon of Yue Yun and was wrapped in thick cloth matching the color of monk robes—there was no piercing or jarring noise. Instead, it produced a deeply resonant, lingering, and vibrating echo!

Even standing right beside it, one could feel a comforting, all-encompassing sense of vastness. It felt as though every muscle, blood vessel, and nerve in his entire body was continuously vibrating in sync with the soundwaves generated by that gong.

For a show-off and flamboyant guy like Bai Haonan accustomed to grabbing the spotlight, this feeling was simply fantastic!

Being tall and strong, Bai Haonan struck the gong with a force akin to the shockwave of an atomic bomb. The soundwaves rippled across the crowded temple plaza, causing many people to turn their heads in that direction and instinctively draw closer.

Sharp-eyed visitors immediately noticed the badge on the tall monk's chest reading "Mandarin Greeter." Sure enough, Chinese tourists began approaching this "foreign monk" with questions: What kind of artifact was this gong? Were there any specific rituals for striking it? And were there any special legends associated with this temple?

One must mention pyramid schemes once more; without that period of experience, Bai Haonan probably wouldn't have possessed his current gift for glib, fluent nonsense. Master Aida had only briefly explained the historical status of this premier temple among the city's three hundred-odd shrines, and what deity was enshrined inside the golden stupa. But in the eyes of this fellow Bai Haonan, what truly mattered were the young women: "Dear ladies, Thai temples do not permit women to enter in revealing attire. Shorts and camisoles like yours, or low-cut and shoulder-baring tops like yours, are expressions of disrespect toward the Buddha statue. Therefore, even with a ticket, entry is not allowed. By the way, entry to our temple is free, but you can purchase and collect a commemorative ticket at the ticket counter. So once you are dressed like this, please head over there to purchase long pants or long skirts..."

Consequently, female tourists actually gathered together, whispering among themselves: "This Thai monk speaks Mandarin so well..." "He's actually a bit handsome, except for the lack of eyebrows..." " Wow, and he has a dog, so cute..."

Let us thank Thailand's tropical climate; the young girls here dressed quite coolly. Bared arms and legs could be seen everywhere, mostly dressed up prettily so they could pose for photos at any moment. Moreover, they likely hailed from all corners of the country. Even though male companions were not in few numbers, groups of female best friends traveling in twos and threes seemed to possess a higher level of attractiveness and much greater enthusiasm for interacting with Ada.

Who could have imagined that even when turning into a monk, Bai Haonan could still turn things into an entirely unexpected situation?

If not for the uncrossable boundary rule forbidding Thai monks from touching women under the watchful eyes of the public, Bai Haonan would have genuinely loved to guide the female patrons hand-in-hand in striking the gong. Oh, just imagining embracing a female patron within the folds of his monk robe while guiding her through a golf swing-like motion with the mallet was entertaining enough.

Of course, the present arrangement wasn't bad either. Bai Haonan adopted the stern expression of a pious monk to guide the girls in striking the gong, while arbitrarily and nonsensically inventing a new function for the gong: he proclaimed that any woman who struck it could make a wish, especially regarding love and marriage. And if she subsequently made a monetary donation to the incense fund, the wish would become even more miraculous!

Whether it was because a tall, muscular, handsome monk was preaching about this "marriage gong," from the moment Bai Haonan started his shift, the spot continuously transformed into a gathering ground for young women!

Having successfully deterred men from disturbing his workstation, Bai Haonan beamed with joy on the inside. Since physical contact was out of the question, simply gazing at them like this and letting the girls line up for his appraisal was quite a joy in itself.

He certainly knew how to entertain himself.

Whenever any pretty woman attempted to take his photo or pose for a selfie with her, he would brush it off by citing Thai customs that strictly forbid women from taking photos with monks. Yet, plenty of girls still stole photos of his back or profile, which later prompted Bai Haonan to use a piece of yellow cloth from a monk's robe to cover the lower half of his face, lending him an even more mysterious and rugged aura!

This utterly infuriated Master Aida, who discovered that the scene had skewed too heavily toward young, attractive women. In particular, after he marched over to tear the yellow cloth from Bai Haonan's face and overheard the girls discussing the marriage folklore, he dragged Bai Haonan behind the golden stupa to lecture him on his work attitude!

In truth, Bai Haonan maintained a stellar attitude. Even while being dragged away, he repeatedly pressed his palms together to bid farewell to the girls, triggering a chorus of returning bows with folded palms: "Master, opening that donation box right now will definitely yield the highest offerings!"

Master Aida lectured earnestly: "We must not allow our minds to be swayed by money..."

Bai Haonan remained unimpressed: "We still need to earn more money, otherwise how would we have the funds to maintain such a glittering golden stupa? We can just keep up a facade of pretending not to care about money. These people are all fools; as long as you trick them by saying it's for wishing on a marriage, you can guarantee they'll all gladly hand over their cash!"

Master Aida sternly rebuked: "We Thai people are not so mercenary!"

Bai Haonan didn't hold much awe even for Lao Chen, let alone this makeshift master standing before him. He chuckled and shook his head: "Please don't say that. Take a walk around the temple today—not to mention the forty-seven donation boxes, look at the electronic fortune-drawing machine in the main hall where we lecture, and calculate how much each divination costs. When you tally up those accounts, it's staggering! Without this money, nothing in this temple could ever be built. You and I both know it's just a matter of fooling the gullible!"

Master Aida was actually left momentarily speechless, reduced to invoking the Buddha's forgiveness with regretful murmurs of "Sins, sins."

Thus, this fellow who hadn't placed the Buddha in his heart at all was reassigned to the exterior of the main temple hall to experience the solemnity of Buddhism up close.

As a result, Bai Haonan stubbornly repurposed a giant ritual cauldron here into a brand-new marriage-wishing site. Anyone who wrote down their wishes and blessings on envelopes and stationery, placed an optional donation inside based on their personal financial situation, and tossed it into the cauldron—which stood taller than a grown person—was guaranteed to receive the Buddha's blessing...

Having toured all the way to the main hall, these visitors possessed financial means seemingly superior to those who merely strolled outside the gates. The vast majority of those concerned with romance were unmarried young women. They listened with rapt attention as the monk master explained how to make a wish, especially regarding how to fill out the wishing slips printed in Thai, which required even more guidance from the master. After all, no matter was too small before the Buddha; a wrong entry would result in a massive misunderstanding with the divine. Therefore, listening to the tall monk master speak with seemingly compassionate and solemn palms pressed together: "To gain, you must first give; true giving precedes receiving. Surely none of you seeking love want a beggar accompanying you..."

There it was! This giant cauldron possessed every qualification to contend for the top three spots in today's temple revenue rankings!

Almost trapped amidst a sea of light sweat and various cosmetic fragrances, if not for the strict monastic rule forbidding monks from touching others, those girls would likely have crowded against him, begging for help filling out their forms. Right now, he was having a blast. *Damn it*, going to a nightclub was barely comparable to this! It seemed that upon returning home in the future, he should seriously consider becoming a monk. Since he'd be an overseas-returned monk by then, he could at least start off as an abbot, right?

Master Aida, following along in speechless exasperation, finally re-assigned Bai Haonan to guard and receive visitors at the most remote structure in the entire temple—the large, ancient stupa. There were no donation boxes over there, making it impossible to cook up any gimmicks for wish-making. Moreover, even the unrenovated structure of the ancient stupa was essentially marked with the scars of war, bearing signs of destruction everywhere. Surely such a place couldn't yield any new tricks!

Yet, the somewhat naive Master Aida had underestimated Bai Haonan's cunning ingenuity. Draped in his monastic robe, he strolled over, circled the eighty-meter-tall brick stupa just once, and stood there smiling with an unfathomable expression.

Truly, Master Bai had stood there lowering his head in reverence to the Buddha for barely ten minutes when several Chinese tourists approached to ask him about the legends surrounding this stupa.

This time, having moved past personal pursuits like female patrons swarming around him, Bai Haonan suppressed a smile and replied: "You see, at the base of this giant stupa are the twelve animals of the Chinese zodiac. You should select the statue matching your own zodiac animal to worship and make a wish, then turn around and walk in a straight line facing the direction your zodiac animal's eyes are pointing. The very first donation box you encounter is your destined karmic blessing; the second will be halved, the third halved again, and so on down to the seventh, which completes this set of zodiac wishes. Your zodiac deity will watch over you forever and always bless you..."

Realizing that the donation boxes across the temple were suddenly bustling with activity once more, Master Aida didn't need to ponder to know this was the mischief of the newcomer. Resigned, he dragged Bai Haonan off to lodge a complaint in Master Tianlong's study hall.

This was no longer the public lecture hall from the morning; it resembled the private study where the paramount grand master sat in meditation and deep contemplation. However, apart from one wall lined entirely with bookshelves filled with various classics and ritual implements, the other three walls consisted of vast, open railings. Spanning roughly the size of a basketball court, the master's small, slender figure sat alone in the center, creating a striking visual impact and an aura of profound mystery.

Master Aida was utterly speechless, though he didn't scold him excessively. He simply recounted everything this new apprentice had done throughout the afternoon to Master Tianlong point by point. True, Bai Haonan hadn't touched the female patrons, nor had he touched the money; but he had spoken falsehoods, told tall tales out of greed, and most importantly, this kind of methodology was leading others astray when everyone else was supposed to be a pure Buddhist.

Master Tianlong listened with considerable interest, which was clearly visible in his gaze. Unlike yesterday's solemnity upon their first meeting, he now tilted his head slightly to observe Bai Haonan from side to side. Although they were separated by three or four meters, Bai Haonan maintained an upright posture, putting on an honest expression. He hadn't bothered thinking about how to defend himself; if he couldn't stay here, he'd simply leave. What status did Lao He hold? Master Tianlong could indulge him in private chats and philosophical discourses for hours. But he was merely a new junior monk—why should anyone bother wasting Mandarin words on him?

Even as a moderately known professional player himself, he wouldn't deign to waste words talking to players or coaches from secondary or regional leagues.

In the end, Master Tianlong waved a hand to dismiss Master Aida first, continuing to lock gazes with Bai Haonan.

It was already four or five in the afternoon. With dinner presumably canceled, the long stretch of time since noon felt somewhat protracted. His biological clock still reminded Bai Haonan of a mild sensation of hunger, but he managed to endure it until Master Tianlong finally spoke first: "Mr. He mentioned that you are a unique young man. Now I confirm his view is correct: you possess no religious faith yet maintain your own steadfast principles; you appear cynical yet achieve a level of self-discipline many young people cannot manage; you seem idle and lazy yet harbor no aversion to striving hard for wealth, even by unscrupulous means. What on earth is your perspective?"

Bai Haonan countered instead: "When you merely tapped my head slightly yesterday instead of striking it heavily like the others, what did you mean?"

The old master smiled: "Whatever you feel it means, that is what it means."

Ah, dropping Zen riddles!