Chapter Seventy-Nine: Tearing Apart

From the terrace of her apartment, Xin Gan saw that Cheng Jiu’s car was still parked by the roadside. He hadn’t left yet, though she had no idea what he was doing inside. It was already late, and the street was hushed, not a soul passing by.

Auntie came upstairs and found Xin Gan standing barefoot on the terrace. With a puzzled tone, she asked, “Xin Gan? What are you looking at?”

Xin Gan snapped out of her reverie and hastily replied, “N-nothing.” She let down the curtain, closed the glass door, and returned indoors. “Auntie, you’re still up?”

“I remembered the door upstairs wasn’t locked, so I came up to check. But what about you, standing there all that time, so late, not asleep yet? Has Mr. Cheng left?”

“He just left. It was stuffy inside, so I stepped out for some air,” Xin Gan replied.

Auntie, unconvinced by her excuse, gave her a knowing look. “You were watching Mr. Cheng, weren’t you? His car is still there. I saw it.”

Xin Gan, a little embarrassed, fell silent.

Auntie, with the seasoned air of someone who had seen it all, said, “Young girls get shy. You’re in the honeymoon phase—I understand.”

Even more flustered, Xin Gan found an excuse to retreat to her room, practically fleeing the rest of the way.

…

Cheng Jiu ignored his doctor’s orders and smoked a cigarette before finally driving off. But he didn’t go back to the Cheng family home; instead, he headed to his own place in the city. Once there, he sent Xin Gan a message, asking her out the next day—he had something to discuss with her.

He had wanted to bring her over that evening, but it was late, and she hadn’t brought a change of clothes, so he let it go.

He lay back fully dressed on the sofa, staring at the ceiling, a smile tugging at his lips. Nothing could compare to the joy he felt today.

He was uncommonly exhilarated, unable to sleep, and wondered if she was still awake too.

She didn’t reply to his message right away. Cheng Jiu stared at his phone for a while, and finally, her reply came—a single word: Okay.

He thought for a moment and called her.

…

Xin Gan had just finished showering and was towel-drying her hair when her phone chimed with a text from Cheng Jiu, inviting her out the next day.

She had no work at the moment, and even if it was a weekday, she didn’t need to clock in. So, she replied with a simple yes.

She hadn’t considered refusing to meet him. After all, they’d already registered their marriage—there was no point in hiding anymore. She might as well be honest about her feelings and see where things would go.

Any plans she’d made before would need to be reconsidered. Besides, having come this far, it was too late for regrets. She and Cheng Jiu were now bound together, and there was no way back.

She was genuinely fond of him—everything about him.

Lost in thought, she was startled by his sudden call.

When she answered, his voice was low as he called her name and asked, “Why aren’t you asleep yet?”

“I just washed my hair. Waiting for it to dry.”

“So late, and you’re still washing your hair?”

Her hair was long and took ages to dry in the evening.

She ruffled her hair. “I sweated a bit during the day. Can’t sleep unless I wash it.”

“Virgo? Obsessively clean?” There was a teasing lilt in Cheng Jiu’s voice.

Xin Gan caught the humor but wasn’t sure if he was mocking her supposed star sign or her neatness. She wasn’t a Virgo, and it was normal for a girl to like cleanliness.

“A bit of a neat freak,” she admitted.

Suddenly, Cheng Jiu grew serious. “Then we’ll have to sleep in separate beds from now on.”

Xin Gan was at a loss for words, unable to match his thick-skinned banter.

After a moment, Cheng Jiu asked, “I’ll pick you up at ten tomorrow. Is that all right?”

Truthfully, he wanted to see her right away, bring her over.

“Ten? Isn’t that a bit early?” she asked.

“Yeah. Come with me to the mall; I need to buy a few things.” His injury wasn’t healed yet. Meng Canchang had objected to him leaving so soon, insisting he should rest longer. But Cheng Jiu was restless. He wanted to settle Xin Gan first, then return home. As for the wedding he owed her, he’d make up for it at the end of the year.

“Fine, ten it is,” she agreed.

“Good.”

Xin Gan licked her lips. “Anything else?”

“That’s all. Rest well. I’ll hang up now.”

“Goodnight,” she said softly.

Cheng Jiu wanted to keep talking, but he didn’t have the heart to keep her up. It was nearly midnight; he hung up and let her rest.

…

That night, Xin Gan barely slept, restless with excitement.

Because she hadn’t slept well, she woke with dark circles and had to cover them with makeup. She applied a subtle lipstick—nothing flashy—then put on a black, fitted cami dress that hugged her waist and accentuated her figure, cool and just a little bit daring.

She looked beautiful. When she went downstairs, Xin Mu saw her and, though her face was full of approval, she said, “Going out today?”

“Yes, I am.”

“With whom? Out shopping with friends?” Xin Mu asked.

Xin Gan suspected her mother was asking on purpose. Only yesterday she’d registered her marriage with Cheng Jiu, and now she was going out—who else could it be but him?

Xin Mu didn’t wait for her answer, just reminded her, “Come back early, don’t stay out too late. If you’re not coming home for dinner, call ahead and I’ll tell Auntie not to make your meal.”

Xin Gan left the house flushed red with embarrassment.

Cheng Jiu had arrived early, leaning against his car, smoking.

He was a heavy smoker—a real veteran. The deep tone of his voice was partly due to it.

He took a drag, exhaling smoke, when he saw Xin Gan coming. His expression instantly darkened, his face falling all at once.

Xin Gan was taken aback, unsure what was wrong, and didn’t dare ask. Standing uncertainly, she greeted, “Good morning.”

Cheng Jiu, expressionless, looked her up and down and grunted, “Get in,” a bit coldly.

Xin Gan felt a pang of disappointment—he didn’t seem happy. She couldn’t quite figure out why.

…

Yesterday, from where Xin Mu had stood on the terrace, she’d seen the car not far away and, of course, Xin Gan and Cheng Jiu together. After they drove off, she smiled in satisfaction and told Auntie, “No need to make Xin Gan’s dinner tonight; she won’t be eating at home.”

…

The atmosphere in the car was even more awkward.

Xin Gan kept her head down, picking at her fingers, and Cheng Jiu said nothing. This wasn’t at all what she’d imagined.

At the mall, Cheng Jiu pushed the cart while she followed behind. He stopped at a section of shelves, looked around, bewildered by the array of choices, and picked up a bottle at random. “What scent of body wash do you use?”

They had to buy everyday items.

“Anything’s fine,” Xin Gan replied. She used common brands, nothing expensive.

Cheng Jiu looked at her directly. “Pick one.”

She grabbed a brand from the shelf and tossed it into the cart.

He smiled faintly and pushed the cart forward.

Xin Gan couldn’t quite figure out what game he was playing, but she followed along, still confused by the change in atmosphere from the day before.

He repeated the process with shampoo.

“Just buy what you’re used to,” she said, gritting her teeth. “No need to ask me.”

With that, she walked over to the snack aisle. She figured she’d take her snacks to her cousin’s house after the mall trip, spend time with Keke, and talk things over with her cousin—her mind felt like it would explode.

Cheng Jiu watched her walk away, sensing her mood, and smiled to himself.

At checkout, Cheng Jiu paid for her snacks as well. It was crowded, and since people were pushing, she didn’t bother insisting on splitting the bill and simply waited for him to pay.

As she was bagging their purchases, someone behind jostled her. In heels, she lost her balance, but managed to grab Cheng Jiu’s arm. He caught her around the waist and drew her into his arms, keeping her from falling.

The young man who had pushed her saw Cheng Jiu’s unfriendly look and immediately realized their relationship, apologizing quickly. “Sorry, it wasn’t on purpose—I’m in a hurry to check out.”

“Being in a hurry means you can push people?” Cheng Jiu was tall and imposing, and when serious, his presence was intimidating. The young man wilted under his gaze, apologizing repeatedly.

Xin Gan said nothing, disentangled herself, and stood steady, saying, “Let’s go—there are a lot of people still waiting to check out.”

She didn’t want to make a scene or escalate things. She hadn’t been hurt, after all, so she preferred to let it go.

Cheng Jiu understood. He wasn’t unreasonable, but he’d seen the man’s push was intentional. If he hadn’t been watching Xin Gan, she could have been hurt.

The cashier quickly tried to smooth things over. If the incident blew up, it would be bad for the store.

“She’s dressed to show off, trying to attract men,” someone in the line muttered—not loudly, but enough for those nearby to hear. The young man who had pushed Xin Gan snickered and gave her another look, as if confirming the accusation.

Cheng Jiu’s brows knit together, his voice sharp. “Who said that? Step forward.”

Xin Gan, seeing he was truly angry, quickly grabbed his arm and whispered, “Let it go, let’s just leave.”

She really didn’t want trouble, especially since Cheng Jiu was still recovering. She didn’t want this to escalate.

But after Cheng Jiu’s question, no one dared speak up, and the cashier kept apologizing.

Seeing Xin Gan wanted to drop it, Cheng Jiu swallowed his anger, holding her hand and giving the young man a warning glare—cold and dangerous.

The young man didn’t dare talk back, his forehead breaking into a sweat under Cheng Jiu’s stare.

…

In the parking garage, Cheng Jiu loaded their things into the car, got into the driver’s seat, and lit a cigarette.

Xin Gan coughed at the smell, and in the next second, Cheng Jiu stubbed it out, rolled down the window to air out the car.

For a moment, neither spoke.

Finally, Cheng Jiu broke the silence. “Did you get hurt?”

Xin Gan shook her head. “No.”

“You can wear whatever you like—it’s your freedom. Don’t mind what others say.” He said this without looking at her.

Xin Gan’s heart skipped a beat. She felt she understood his strange mood from that morning and asked tentatively, “Then why were you ignoring me earlier?”

“I wasn’t ignoring you.”

“You were.”

Cheng Jiu turned to look at her, their eyes meeting. His gaze changed, his voice even lower. “I wasn’t ignoring you.” He just didn’t dare look at her.

Now that their marriage was official, there were more things he wanted to do with her. He was afraid he wouldn’t be able to control himself.

His self-restraint was nothing in front of her.

Xin Gan lowered her eyes, staring unfocused at her fingers. “I felt like you weren’t happy, though I don’t know why.”

When you care, you’re easily affected by the other’s mood.

If he was off in any way, she could sense it in his eyes, his expression, his tone.

Probably many long-distance relationships failed for this reason. Failing to notice each other’s emotional shifts in time, unable to respond, people would feel neglected, misunderstood. Arguments would start—endless arguments that would eventually burn the relationship to ashes.

She and Cheng Jiu would likely have to face long-distance too.

Suddenly, her chin was lifted, and Cheng Jiu’s handsome, rugged face loomed close. She could see his eyelashes, feel his breath—warm, humid, tinged with tobacco.

She didn’t dislike it. She just realized, helplessly, how completely she’d fallen for him.

Cheng Jiu looked at her and said, “I wasn’t upset. I was just trying to restrain myself from tearing off that dress of yours.”

It took Xin Gan a while to grasp what he meant.

He pinched her delicate chin, looking pleased, his thumb stroking her skin as he laughed softly. “How could I be unhappy? You married me. I could wake up laughing from this dream.”

Her ears flushed, burning hot. She couldn’t handle his tender words, dropped so easily and anywhere.

Her outfit was really quite normal, but to him, it was simply too tempting.

…

Xin Gan accompanied him to his city apartment. It wasn’t her first time there; she still remembered the layout. After entering, she went straight to the kitchen for a glass of water. The heat left her parched, or so she told herself.

She downed two glasses before she felt better.

Cheng Jiu came over and stood beside her. “Pour me one too.”

This scene was almost identical to the last time.

Blocking her path, he left her no choice. “I’ll get you another glass,” she said.

“Isn’t there one in your hand?”

“I just used it.”

“I don’t mind,” he replied. After all, they’d already kissed—what was there to mind?

Last time, she poured water and he refused it, opting to kiss her instead.

This time, she handed him the glass, and he drained it in one go.

A faint lipstick print lingered on the rim. She wondered if he noticed.

She suspected he had.

At noon, Mrs. Cheng called to ask where Cheng Jiu was and why he wasn’t coming home for lunch.

He hadn’t told her where he was going that morning, just left to pick up Xin Gan.

Standing on the balcony to cool down, he said, “I won’t be back, don’t wait for me.”

“You’ve only just been discharged, running around every day. You just registered with Xin Gan yesterday, and now you’re off again. Be sure to keep in close contact with her, don’t neglect her,” Mrs. Cheng admonished, thinking he was out dining with He Chuan as usual.

…

Xin Gan, meanwhile, was putting away the daily necessities in the guest bathroom when she heard him on the phone. She didn’t ask who it was. Once she finished, she came out.

Cheng Jiu met her at the door. “Don’t worry about that now—let’s go eat.”

“Going out?”

“Yeah. There’s no food at home, nothing to cook with. We’ll buy kitchen stuff in the afternoon, but for now, let’s eat out.”

…

He called it a casual meal, but Cheng Jiu still carefully picked a restaurant. As soon as they ordered, Cheng Hui called, asking where he was. He told her he was eating.

Cheng Hui immediately insisted on joining them, threatening to make a fuss if he refused.

Cheng Jiu tried to hang up, but she said, “If you don’t let me come, I’ll call Sister Xin. I’ve got her number.”

He could have strangled her.

But, since they rarely saw each other, he relented.

Xin Gan didn’t mind—it was just a meal.

Cheng Hui arrived in a rush, and as soon as she saw Xin Gan, she clung to her arm, mock-crying, “My brother finally did something right—marrying you, Sister Xin. Our family is truly blessed.”

Cheng Jiu looked her over with distaste. “Why are you so dark?”

Cheng Hui immediately covered her face. “You’re the one who’s dark! I’m just a little tanned.” She’d been out in the sun a month for military training. No amount of sunscreen could hold up against all that sweating.

Xin Gan glanced at her. “Is training over?”

Cheng Hui’s voice was still hoarse as she took a drink of water. “Three days left. Almost.”

“Not yet?”

“Our school’s notorious for extra-long training. It’s inhumane.” She pointed at her face. “Three skin tones—my forehead’s the lightest, nose second, the lower half is darkest. I look like a ghost.”

Xin Gan was amused by her self-mocking tone, her eyes curving like crescent moons.

Cheng Hui pouted. “I’ve lost my voice from all the shouting. I told the instructor I’d had throat surgery and couldn’t yell, but he wouldn’t listen. Made me stand at attention too. I burst into tears. And you, brother—why don’t you come back and be our instructor?”

Cheng Jiu snorted. “Not even the same system. Besides, the instructors they assign to you are all rookies—it’s just for fun.”

He ordered two servings of iced pear soup.

“Fun? Their standards are strict! I cry every night. Sister Xin, haven’t you noticed? My brother’s a cold-hearted brute. It’s not too late for you to ditch him.”

Xin Gan just smiled and poured her some tea.

Cheng Jiu corrected her, unhurriedly. “Cheng Hui, change that—call her ‘sister-in-law.’”

Xin Gan was still getting used to this new identity. When she looked up and met Cheng Jiu’s gaze, she quickly looked away, taking a sip of water.

Cheng Jiu felt parched as well—maybe it was just the heat—and drank.

“Sis, my brother’s in your hands now. If he makes you unhappy, tell me. We’re all on your side.”

The day they registered their marriage, Cheng Hui had been at school and no one had told her. She’d only found out after calling Mrs. Cheng to complain.

She was overjoyed, muttering, “My brother moved fast. I thought it wouldn’t happen till year’s end.”

Mrs. Cheng had told her to mind her words.

Cheng Hui was genuinely happy, truly fond of Xin Gan, watching her with admiration. “Sis—sister-in-law, your skin is so beautiful. Next to you, I look like a shadow.”

Xin Gan comforted her, “You’ll be fair again by winter. You used to be very fair—don’t worry.”